The Gentleman Loser

Thoughts and Musings of a Loser

A few days ago a not-so-mysterious package arrived in my mail.  Inside was an advance copy of The New Loud’s upcoming EP, Can’t Stop Not Knowing.  You may remember that I mentioned this entertaining band in my review of the 2009 Forward Festival. So seeing as I have this shiny new bit of  soul and commercial product in my hand, I might want to give it a review.

Don't Dance

First off, the packaging itself is nice.  A glossy digipack case with lots of clean solid coloration.   From a graphic design standpoint, it is simple and tasefull while evoking a mood consistent with at least the albums slower songs.  I should take a moment to mention that the graphic design element for this band is really strong, take for example the image to the right, created for the EP’s single Don’t Dance. What looks like a simple Holga double exposure evokes an aesthetic that makes one think of a movie poster.  Which brings us to…

The first track, Don’t Dance starts out a little iffy, but structured oddly which keeps you interested.   Around the 2 min mark it becomes amazing.   The call and response style made me think back on just before AFI became a big thing.   Synths are simple, frentic and analoguey.  You can hear for yourself by checking out the music video posted on their blog. And you should.

Next on the EP is a cover of Radiohead’s 2+2=5.  The presence of both a male and female vocalist has a surprisingly strong effect on the vibe of this cover.  The band’s driving-an-out-of-control-car feverishness plays well with the original song’s lyrics.   An intense song like that is all the more impactful when it runs head first into the slower ballad song Heaven which is sweet but seems rather simple compaired to the complexity of it’s peers on this album.

“The Short Way to Get You” starts out with a slow gait, but in short time picks up to a more poppy pace.  Perky bright synths contrast with vocals that remind me in a abstruse way of a lovechild between Alkaline Trio and Brandtson.  This song is the one that stikes me as having the most “mainstream potential” though I am not sure whether I mean it as compliment or criticism.  One thing for sure is that this song strongly illustrates the vocal talent of this band.

Every Girl I See, which is a demo, might be my favorite song on the EP.  Only a little rough, it is a somber song drenched in distrortion and noise.  It’s no wonder that I especially like this one, I’m a sucker for that combination.   Were I the one putting this album together, I would have closed it with this track.  Aside from being a great wind-down from the pacing of the rest of the EP, as it ends, it leaves the listener with a bit of emotional residue.

All in all, this seems like a whole differnt band from the one I saw live at Forward Fest.   Now that I have a chance to hear more than the wall of structured noise and frustration, I am surprised to find harmonies and a far more positive and hopeful soul at this band’s core.  I am looking forward to their upcoming LP, but in the more near future, I can look forward to their next show here in Madison:

The New Loud 1/23/2010 10:00 PM at High Noon Saloon – Yo La Tengo after party w/The Hood Internet

701A E. Washington Ave., Madison, Wisconsin 53703

This last Saturday (Jan 9th 2010) Velvet Darkness put on a screening of Rocky Horror Picture Show at The Majestic complete with live stage show underneath the projector screen, props, and lots of rowdy audience members.  I am going to assume that you, the reader (I have readers?), are familiar not only with the movie, but the basics of it’s cult traditions.  If you are not, a suggest checking out it’s Wikipedia page that I have helpfully linked two sentences ago.

Costume Show 2

Preceding the film screening and live reenactment, were other festivities, complete with party favors such as fake plastic lips, party whistles, and the odd condom.  Pre-show events included a costume contest and a trivia contest, both with prizes.

Now, this was my first time seeing Rocky Horror in a theater setting, and as such it was an exciting engagement.  As it would seem, however, I was not alone.  I was VERY not alone.  I would say that along with me, roughly a third of the audience threw in their lot with the uninitiated and got up on the stage so that the presenters could coronate our devirginization.

Before the show started proper, the MC layed down some ground rules.  Each ground rule, if broken, would, through an unlikely series of events, result in the same fate, “we all fucking die!”   One of such rules was to not through rice because, as he points out, rice will “cook” within the sweaty bras of the performers and that is gross (and will lead to a disease that will spread through the theater and we’ll ALL FUCKING DIE).  However, without fail, rice was thrown from the balcony during the wedding scene.

Much of the show proper was drowned out by the sound of various audience members shouting the many varied “audience responses” at the screen.  My friend Rob, who was in attendance, said that you could, “tell which decade people got into Rocky Horror by what they yelled at the screen.”  My personal favorite bit is an offshoot of the running gag that whenever Brad appears on screen you should yell “asshole” and whenever Janet appears on screen you should yell “slut.”  Well in an early scene, the two are driving through the rain and as the windshield wiper goes back and forth in front of them the audience yelled “Asshole, slut, asshole, slut…” and on and on.

The performers on stage acted out, in rather impressive synchronicity, the events on screen and proved that the freaks have all the talent in this world.

Velvet Darkness plans for another show in the coming months of this year.Announcement

Found this quote of mine on of all places:

““How about I just say this: I sit down in front of my toys and whatever comes out of them is what comes out. I’m tired of trying to be this or that, I just am. **** it, I don’t know the inner workings of the universe and neither do you, and when it comes down to it, that has nothing to do with music, so where does that leave us?””

It’s hilarious because on the surface it sounds kinda deep and stuff, but if you think about it for a few seconds, you realize that I’m just totally rambling shit that I pulled out of my ass.  But according to Channel3000, I “dance to the beat of my own mixtape.”

Also discovered today that some short stories I wrote last decade, likely along with other stories that were published in the same anthology, have been translated to Russian.  Da comrades!

But UPDATES, yes updates:
Morey and I are currently in the studio cooking up track for our “Intergalactic Sugar Club” project and will have a full length album out sometime early Febtober.  We also have a second album at around the %75 mark.  We planned to have THAT one (titled …will have their revenge on Madison) out in April, though that may be pushed back in order to do something weird with that one, bring in a bunch of collaborators to fuck it all up.

On The Gentleman Loser front, I am busy starting work on writing a new EP to be titled Five Cocks to Block You that should be finished in a month or two and released early Spring.  So far, it’s going to be cool, and will be a solid album I can stand behind, and will be trying to make a more concerted effort to get this one published.  If nothing else it has great album art.five cocks to block you update1



The night was a clusterfuck.

I was going to the Wil-Mar center, a place I always hear about on fliers in cafés but had never been, to see my friend Julie perform in a belly dancing troop.  Do groups of belly dancer call themselves a troop?  Or is it something more exotic, like coterie?  Regardless I got there late and had to stand just outside the door to the main room along with a man and his ever crying baby.

Going from there I went to my favorite block in Madison.  The little one-way stretch of E. Main street just off of the capitol square.  There were two bands I wanted to see, and both of them were playing at the same time in two neighboring venues.

Sleeping in the Aviary was playing at The Frequency and The Gusto was playing at The Corral Room (of course).  So I started out with Sleeping in the Aviary, who were playing their blend of psychedelic power pop.  Interestingly enough, they were promoting at their merch booth a new project (a big surprise for musicians who’s prolific nature makes KMFDM look stingy) called inBOIL.  I didn’t have to even care what it sounded like (it sounds good by the way, or at least as good as ironic country music can) to buy it.  The packaging was a hand-made cardboard book with a personalized title (each copy had a different album name, mine was “Be A Gentleman”).  Morey and I had just been talking about how we were going to release our next CD and this kind of tactic was much discussed, but I digress.


Mid-way through the set I dashed off to the back alley and popped in to The Corral Room (I had been jumping back and forth during the opening bands for a few hours already, and wish I could recall one of The Gusto’s opening bands because they were really good).  The Gusto had gotten a song or two into their set and the crowd was getting rowdy.  That’s the best part of going to shows in that venue, the crowds are always dense and really into the shows.  The Gusto have always been a solid pop-punk band, and the members have been at it for well over a decade now.  Suffice to say, they know what they’re doing and it shows.  The set wound down to one shirtless man and a group of several audience members commandeering one of the microphones to sing along.  I left to go back to The Frequency.

Sleeping in the Aviary played for another half hour beyond that, putting on a long set, perhaps making up for lost time from their much maligned Forward Fest show.  I have a friend who said he once say them do an entire show with the lead singer Elliot having a blanket over his head.  That said I have seen them put on some rather incoherent shows, but this night they seemed…concise.  I don’t know whether I think that made it a good show or a bad show.  It’s just hard to tell with them.

FRIDAY NIGHT (or Saturday morning)

It’s 4am and I am driving around Madison. Too awake to go back home and not ready to call it a night. I checked out the official afterparty. It wasn’t for me. Immediately I was greeted by a drunk fratboy yelling “Brandon!” at me. Clearly I was in the wrong environment, and clearly, my name was not Brandon.


So now I am just driving aimlessly around Madison, the streets eerily empty this time of night. I’m listening to “I knew that you knew” by The Love Generation. I’d change the radio, but there wouldn’t be anything else on anyway. I want to smoke a cigarette, but I’m out of matches. Doesn’t matter though, Denny’s is on the horizon and I can start writing all this down.

Last night I had the singular pleasure of opening the Reverence Showcase of Forward Fest at The Frequency. We had been practicing and writing new material for almost two months leading up to the show. It was a success and I could now start enjoying the shows.

The Dark Clan played after us. Dan looked like a pirate. A far cry from the image portrayed in their previous album “The Vampire Wore White.” But perhaps a proper choice for their new EP “Goths on a Boat” which I was too drunk to remember to pick up.

As I am writing this, something like half of the performers for tomorrow night’s Reverence lineup walk into the restaurant, say “Hi,” and take a seat in the booth on the other side of the room. I am suddenly conscious that I am still wearing my “artist” pass.

Thursday night concluded for me with two more bands in the Reverence lineup. The Atomica Project brought their trip-hoppy sound and provided a nice segway from Dark Clan’s rock to glassGhosts’s dark atmospheric goth.   Atomica does a cover of Nine Inch Nails’ “We’re In This Together” a nice reminder of the band who recently played their last show.   glassGhosts then wrap the night up with one of their strongest performances ever. Vocals were perfect, and the sound mixing was more balanced than ever. For their stage show, a man dressed as a skeleton appears to resurrect a dead lover by turning her into a marionette puppet, only to have her escape her bonds and do the same to him.

Tonite played out differently thought. Due to clusterfuckary in the festival schedule I was unable to see three of the bands I planned on catching: Margot and the Nuclear So and So’s, Sleeping in the Aviary, and The Gusto. So my home base for the night was mainly The Orpheum for the Reverence and Wongz Wok showcases.

Pezzettino stomps at The Orpheum Lobby

First up for me was Pezzettino, energetic accordion rock from Milwaukee.  Margaret Stutt stomps on the cement floor in her stockings while working the accordion like it were a living thing in her hands.  Needless to say, I was impressed.

The New Loud was, well, quite loud, though audio issues kept Jessi’s vocals from having their proper impact.  She was visibly frustrated by the problems, but compensated by screaming that extra bit harder.  I was about to leave to The High Noon to try to catch Margot, but was duly informed that I should check out the next band Terrior Bute and I was glad I did.  I have no idea how to describe them except to say that it was like a controlled fusion reaction occurring in a small corner of The Orpheum Lobby.  Bonus points to having the equipment cabling hang from the overhanging stairs down to the band.

Arriving at The High Noon Saloon, I was surprised to not be hearing any music.  Shortly thereafter I was informed that the band just getting on the stage was the first band, and the show had been delayed something like an hour and a half from it’s start time.  I stayed to watch the first band Princeton.   Wow, they sucked.  They were dreary and the singer seemed to be trying to emulate John Lennon crossed with The Weakerthans.  Then they finish their set with a cheesy synthpop wannabe song that made me lose faith in humanity.

I realized that I wouldn’t be able to stay here long enough to see Sleeping in the Aviary nor Margot.  As it turned out, Sleeping in the Aviary got moved to the end of the night anyway, and played a really weird long and possibly improvised song.  Margot played with only 2 of the band members present.  So basically both of the bands I had went there to see but couldn’t ended up played really unique sets that would have been a great experience to see.  It wasn’t a total wash, I picked up some vinyl from both bands at the merch booth as a consolation.

Terrior Bute 1

The second band, Archie Powell and the Exports were a breath of fresh air though.  I resolved to catch a few of their songs before leaving for The Corral Room.  I go up nice and close to the front of the stage.  Ra Ra Riot’s gear was piled up in front of me and made a nice place to stash my newly bought records and rest my camera on.  Archie et. all played good old fashioned rock with more than a few nods to classic rock roots.  The vocal styles reminded me The Selfish Gene songs where Webber did the vocals.  What ever happened to that guy?

I then went to The Corral Room hoping to catch a few songs by The Gusto before heading back to The Orpheum for Cyanotic.  Unfortunately I found that not only had none of the bands started, but The Gusto had been pre-empted by one of the bands from the showcase that got bumped over from that showcase running too long.  So my stop there was useless, though I ran into my brother which was nice, and was able to apologize to Jason at least for missing the show.

Back at The Orpheum, Los Bastardos Guapos was in the middle of their set.  Pretty much exactly what I expected from them, except louder and harsher.  Industrial beats, faux Mexican accents,  tequila, sombreros and calling cards for escort services.  Cyanotic’s set was intense.  Probably the most metal-infused I have heard industrial music be, while still being decidedly industrial-styled.  Lots of songs about society, drugs and decadence.


I closed the night out with YACHT out in the lobby.  A band with their own built in cult-like  belief system was a must see (though YACHT is not a cult and would like you to know this).  Arriving through the back entrance I immediately could smell pot smoke, something I would never have expected within The Orpheum.  Looking at the mass of bodies in the center of the lobby, it was clear that the audience was thoroughly indoctrinated.  There was trippy (often alternating) black and while video splashed across a wall.  The bass vibrating through the projector made the video stranger still, giving it a stuttering quality.  Jona is in the middle of the crowd holding a microphone dressed all in white like a preacher.  Earlier in the set he was dressed all in black.  The duality of lightness and darkness is a big deal with this band and more information about their philosophy can be found on their website.

And so, having now finished eating my Taking Back Sunday-branded Denny’s late night meal, I end this rambling scrawl, snag a book of matches, and head home.

SATURDAY NIGHT (or Sunday morning)

I’m tired.  I smell.  The rather cold night’s air has dried off all the sweat though, and a trip to Woodman’s (where I ran into fellow Reverence-goers) yielded some butternut squash ravioli that is currently in a boiling pot in my kitchen.  The day started out nice.  Slept in (as was necessary) and woke up hangover-free.  Relaxed.  Ripped video footage from my Thursday performance as well as footage from Cyanotic’s performance last night.  Then headed out to The Frequency to start things out with a little bit of Little Red Wolf.

Little Red Wolf 3

It was the right way to ease into things.  A beautiful sunny day, though merely warm, not hot, with a slight breeze.  Too calm to just jump into the Reverence Showcase which I would be spending the remainder of the day at.  Their music was mostly a mellow experience to soothe me into the afternoon.  Though that changed.  We saw Emily Mills play the accordion (hot damn, two accordion acts in one festival) and that eventually gave way into “Bella In the Elm” which saw the tempo and the volume rise considerably.   The band members all changed places and the closing track brought things back down, though only a little.  I did my best to help them move some equipment back to their van and then I raced off to The Inferno to catch Parasite Twin.

Parasite Twin put on a good third year Reverence performance.  The vocals on Twins of Pleasure seemed somehow improved, but only hearing the song once a year made the change hard to pinpoint.  Of course there was their new cover of Lady GaGa’s “Pokerface” which was a real crowd pleaser in it’s irreverence.  That lead into Captive Six’s first live performance.  Powerful basslines and drums meshed with distorted vocals and samples.  Sadly their merch box got misplaced by the airline and apparently ended up in Texas.

Perhaps CTRL, hailing from Austin, could have brought it back.  Instead they brought the noise (did you see what I did there, I am such a wordsmith).  CTRL brought your standard level of industrial harshness but the vocals were more melodic and position them to stand out a bit from the crowd.  Sensuous Enemy was up next with their seductive brand of electronica.  Near the end of the set they busted out a cover of Garbage’s “Push It” that appropriately pleased the Madison crowd.  Cover’s seemed to be hot that night, as  Null Device pulled out quite the surprise with a cover of Jace Everett’s “Bad Things,” best known from the intro music to True Blood.  In addition to that, Dan Clark from The Dark Clan got called up to stage and together they did a companion piece to Dark Clan’s “Lestat in Cuba” called “Lestat in Punjab” which complemented Null Device’s diverse middle east to eastern instrumentations.

Alter der Ruin 3

Alter der Ruin pretty much stole the show though.  Intense beats, samples, and unrepenting glitch made this band almost an endurance challenge.  Bonus points go to both keyboardists using apparent home made keytars with Kaossilator attachments.  Did I mention that they were wireless?  Yeah they were, and one of the keyboardists repeatedly bulldozed through the audience.

The Gothsicles started off their set with a little video making light of the fact that they had to follow Alter der Ruin, though they didn’t need to worry.  The crowd was wound up and ready to shout along to “Konami Code IV” and freak out to “Nine Dudes Freaking Out.”  They successfully debuted a song about a video game I have never heard of.  Then Matt Fanale of Caustic got on stage as his alter-ego “Sega Lugosi” to sing about balls.

Izoloscope finished out the set with brutal beats.  He would seemingly come to the end of a song only to punch you in the face with a full throttle return of force.  Following his set, Caustic announced that he would do a surprise performance since he was cut from the previous night’s lineup to do festival mishaps.  He debuted a new track called “Shrapnel Condition” and though my earplugs made his vocals less intelligible that usual, the crowd ate it up.

Click HERE to see photographs from the fest.

PEELANDER-Z hangin' around.

Saw a very cool Japanese punk band called PEELANDER-Z that really was into crowd interaction. This band knows how to put on a show. They found, at least a slight way, to get the crowd involved in each song. Wheather handing out percussive instruments to everyone, or starting a massive limbo then jump rope competition, or even moving the drumset from the stage into the middle of the crowd, they sent us all to ninja highschool, and we loved it.

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Old FakeLast weekend spent a lot of time at The Frequency watching some good acts including Cemetery Improvement Society, The Revolving Doors, Old Fake, Child Bite and Sally Grundy.

This was the first time that I got a chance to see Cemetery Improvement Society since they became a two band act. The last time I had saw them is when I was the opening act for one of their shows at The Annex, and I was (due to post show celebratories) incredibly inebriated, and only remembered how much I enjoyed the show but no details, except that the dude played the guitar like he was fighting with it. This time around, I enjoyed them, but I suspect for a very different reason. The effect of a second mind (new member Russell Paul) in the mix has resulted in something slightly different, but more solid, and the balance between rock and techno has been tipped (paradoxically, and probably for the best) a bit more toward the rock direction. I suggest you check out THIS LINK to The Isthmus to listen to the track “Sixth Severance” to get an idea of what I mean.

They have  a CD out called “Lonely Dog Island” and it runs the gamut of bleeps and bloops, guitar wankery (the good kind), and irreverent pokes at pop music.  Live, they performed a pastache’ of pop songs that seemed like an adaptation of their CD track “Drunk Up The Jams”.  This wouldn’t be a first for CIS, as the previous release, an acetate CD EP called “You Are Lucky”, contained a cover of Pat Benatar’s song “Love is a Battlefield” that was at once perverse and catchy.  I look forward to seeing them again at the MAMA’s Afterparty.

Child Bite 1

In the two nights of music that I had taken in, I had also seen The Revolving Doors and Old Fake. Both bands were enjoyable. However, and this is not meant to be a diss, I don’t remember much about them at this time (this article is, after all, written several weeks after the fact).

What I do remember, above all, is the band Child Bite. I had no idea what was in store for me with this band, and I still don’t know exactly what to call their music. It’s almost metal, but still good old fashioned rock, but with the energetic intensity of punk music without the trashy trappings. For possibly the first half of their set, I wasn’t especially reeled in, and made a few trips to the bar.  They were maybe a little bit too metal (not in that fortunately dead NuMetal sort of way, but in something more akin to simply really hard rock) or maybe their long scary beards distracted me.  However, after a little while they got the audience, and myself quite wound up.

At one point of the show, I was busy shooting photos of the lead singer and I looked up from my camera to see that the guitarist had disappeared.

Child Bite 3

Scanning over the room, I found him, with his wireless guitar, rocking out in the face of the guy who stamps your hands when you pay cover. On his way back, he was kind enough to tap me on the shoulder and pose on one of the bar stools (the photo is below). Their set ended with the lead singer climbing up and around the amps and rather dramatically falling off them, onto the floor, out of the sight of the crowd. Great fun.

The last band was Sally Grundy. Seeing that I had already made the acquaintance of this band via their bass player, I was long overdue to hear them perform. First off, the stage set up and the way the band presents themselves is very well tailored. The sodium flare of an old TV set flickers away in the background, while what sounds like a 70′s era hygiene instructional plays on an old record player.

Sally Grundy 2

The disembodied legs of a mannequin seal the deal. Musically, they seem reminiscent of early Nirvana, blended with a little bit of Sonic Youth which surprised me because I had listened to an audio tape demo (such a great, and sorely missed format) that they had produced of some of their songs and found it to have a very different quality entirely, something of a similar era, but altogether different.  The show was entertaining, slightly sleazy, and perhaps a little dreary.

They have an EP out, and it’s four tracks are dutifully performed.  It’s a pretty decent little record, probably good for listening to while smoking cigarettes on a porch during a rain storm, probably good to listen to while fucking as well.  Short EP aside, this band has an extensive repertoire of songs to choose from when playing live.

The live show itself was pretty standard (though since this show, I have seen them at smaller venues such as The Wisco, and they get ROWDY) and perhaps a little tame.  My only complaint was that the show itself seemed a little sloppy.

Sally Grundy 1

The stopping to restring the guitar, while affording the audience time to get another beer, or listen to the record player, was perhaps a bit much.  But hey, it’s a bar, it’s a show, and maybe it all was pre-planned in a ploy to make us all go “What the Fuck” right before dropping a sonic brick on our heads.

A nice long weekend.  Lots of shows, and a thirst for more.  Lots of Ale Asylum’s fantastic Ambergeddon (The Frequency has it on tap!).  All and all, I went to work the next morning paying for it, but not regretting one bit.

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Venus DeMars and All The Pretty Horses 1As I approach the door to The Inferno, I can already hear the voice of Jai from Sensuous Enemy beckoning, a mix of seduction and soul-rending emotion. However, tonite, they are not the reason I came. I came to see something different, something that practically begs to be seen live.

Venus DeMars and All The Pretty Horses is a Minneapolis, MN-based glam rock band. The leadsinger, Venus, is the talented and transgenered S. Grandell whose performance art past lends itself to the band’s presentation.

It only took a few songs for me to note an interesting dichotomy. Venus DeMars and All The Pretty Horses, while having the appearance and presentation of a glam-rock band, were for the most part playing music that harkened back more to grunge rock than to anything Gary Glitter would have envisioned.

The show itself was rather straightforward. What makes the show interesting are the people on the stage, no fancy light show, no (well few) weird props. Both Venus and the bass player LeFreak have fantastic outfits. LeFreak, seemingly taking Jermaine/Ziggy-Stardust-Tour-Bowie’s advice about the eyepatch, is a show in himself, while Venus coordinates chains and feathers brilliantly. Just the way they move around the stage, how they interact with each other and their instruments brings to mind some sort of Bachhian nightmare. When this band plays, there are sparks, litterally.

Check out the small video below showcasing a taste of what this band can do.

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Exploding Kitten GodheadSo I’ve started going to these Starlight Cinema events at the UW union building. They generally do a good job of pushing the boundaries of the little container in my brain that stores fucked-up shit. This show was no different.

I arrived late, as is, unfortunately, usually the case due to my work schedule. Approching the Play Circle theatre, I could tell the show was midway through, due to the loud droning noise of feedback coming from behind the walls. I knew this was, very possibly, going to be one of the more difficult things I have taken the time to bear witness to. Still, I found an open seat in the front row and took it.

Seemingly random bars of light flickered at seizure-inducing speeds on the the screen as the loud droning feedback squelched from all speakers. Now I figure I should try to explain to you, the reader, exactly what this show is supposed to be. See, there is a line of thinking that through auditory (espeially if there is a specific frequency offset between each speakers) and visual stimulation, one can effect a change in the subject’s brainwave patterns that goes beyond simple viewer engagement. Unfortunately, this usually means that the stimiulation is increadibly noisy (and loud, as to drown out competing stimulation), there is structure, but it is not pleasant to listen to. The video below will give you an idea.

What was interesting, was that the video imagery shown was not some random computer flashes, as I had expected. Instead, the performer, Daid Linton, had a number of different objects rotating on turntables with camera’s aimed at them (candles, glass spheres, cat heads…more on that in a bit). For additional light (and specific frequency strobing as well) was a TV monitor flashing bars of static (sometimes through a color gel that he would put in front of it). All of this feeding into a video mixer produced the images we saw on the screen. The audio, however, appeared to be a series of tracks being cued up on a computer screen.

After about a half hour of staring at the screen, it happened. I started to feel my brain slip off into an altered-state. Something was slushing it’s way up from the bottom of my brain stem, and my mind stated to become diffuse. It was almost as if my proprioception shifted so that my body extended across the room. It was pretty interesting, but then the sound in the tone took a shift for the darker, and feedback stated building into an overwhelming sound that started to reel me back in. Then it happened. On the screen, there was the GIANT KITTEN EXPLODING GODHEAD. An image of a vauge torso with a plastic cat’s head, visual feedback flowing off of the head in two directions somehow in sync with the building feedback of the noise that surrounded me. With a shock like that, you can do little else than be yanked right back into reality.

Looking around the theatre, I saw peoples faces illuminated in the pale light reflecting off of the screen. Their muscles slack, jaws open, minds somewhere else. After a little while longer, the intensity of the audio and video started to subside, and it wound down to a pleasant, medatative atmosphere. The sound started to fade out, and the little table of cameras and light faded down and the show drew to a close. Lights still dim, crowd silent, David blows out a candle, and like the final cleansing rite to some elaborate ritual, the crowd is released from his spell, and comes back, minds returned to the limitations of space and time.

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Emo Menu 2I mean seriously. There’s selling out and there’s getting an item on the bloody Denny’s menu. Like I don’t expect more from these bands, but still, come on man. It makes sense though, you always see the tweens at Denny’s late night after the shows. For added bonus, check the photos of the various bands in Denny’s “chef” outfits. See, Eddie Reyes is in the back slaving over your Taking Back Bacon Burger Fries….

PS, I think the menu item from Eagles of Death Metal should, instead of “Heart on a Plate” pancakes, be a waffle dish called “Death Waffles.”

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